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Author Topic:   A joke...
Chineseman
Honorary Warlord

Posts: 357
From: The Philippines
Registered: Mar 2002

posted 07 April 2002 00:29     Click Here to See the Profile for Chineseman   Click Here to Email Chineseman        Reply w/Quote   
A man's wife is in deathbed. And the wife has a secret she has kept for so long, and now she wants her husband to know before she goes away.

"Honey, I must tell you something..." said the wife.

"No, dear, just rest and conserve your energy," replied her husband.

"No, I want to tell you, so that I could have peace of mind."

"Yes, dear, I know, but it's okay not to tell me. Everything is just fine."

"No, I want to tell you. I slept with your brother, your father, and your best friend," said the wife.

"Yes, dear, I know all about that. Why do you think I poisoned you?"


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It is difficult to win a friend in a year; it is easy to offend one in an hour.

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Vimes
Lord

Posts: 106
From: The Netherlands
Registered: Apr 2002

posted 07 April 2002 06:21     Click Here to See the Profile for Vimes   Click Here to Email Vimes        Reply w/Quote   Visit Vimes's Homepage!
LOL!
Oh man... That was great!
Well, I laughed, didn't anyone else?
Sorry, I'll go away...

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For the last 20 years I've been trying to get a life... Maybe in the next 20 years I'll try harder...

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Beaver
Honorary Warlord

Posts: 1682
From: I live in a dam, down by the river....
Registered: Jan 2002

posted 07 April 2002 09:26     Click Here to See the Profile for Beaver   Click Here to Email Beaver        Reply w/Quote   
As bad as that it, it is still hilarious..... I have to share that with some of my friends who I know would appreciate it....

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Well, you can tell by the way I use my walk,
I'm a woman's man: no time to talk.
Music loud and women warm, I've been kicked around since I was born.
And now it's all right. It's OK. And you may look the other way.
We can try to understand the New York Times' effect on man.

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Jolly_Reaper
Honorary Warlord

Posts: 384
From: The Netherlands
Registered: Feb 2002

posted 08 April 2002 00:10     Click Here to See the Profile for Jolly_Reaper   Click Here to Email Jolly_Reaper        Reply w/Quote   


Well, I thought it was funny

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The ultimate warrior: The Virtuous Avatar wearing one of FeistyGirl's magical pink Tutu's.
Britannia, beware!!!

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Chineseman
Honorary Warlord

Posts: 357
From: The Philippines
Registered: Mar 2002

posted 09 April 2002 01:24     Click Here to See the Profile for Chineseman   Click Here to Email Chineseman        Reply w/Quote   
I thought it was funny too...

How about this...

A man is having trouble with his "little buddy". Seems that his "little buddy" ain't so little. He's well endowed with 25 inches flat!

So he goes to a doctor and claims, "Doc, I'm having trouble in bed. My "gun" is too big."

The doctor says, "I have no solution to your problem. But I could ask you to try out the Enchanted Frog. You can find her at the pond behind this hospital. Talk to her and ask her to marry you. Everytime she says, 'No.', your "gun" will become 5 inches shorter!"

"Thanks, doc," replied the happy man.

Now he goes to the pond behind the hospital and sees the Enchanted Frog. He approaches and asks the frog, "Will you marry me?"

The frog said, "No."

Suddenly the man felt a bit lighter. When he looked down to check, he realized that his "gun" had indeed become 5 inches shorter! But he realizes that it is still too long, so he asks again, "Will you marry me?"

The frog again said, "No."

The man felt lighter again. He looked down and saw that his "gun" went 5 inches shorter again! Still not satisfied that his "gun" had 15 inches in length, he again asks the frog, "Will you marry me?"

The irate frog then said, "How many times will I have to tell you?! No! No! No!"


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It is difficult to win a friend in a year; it is easy to offend one in an hour.

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Sir_General
Moderator

Posts: 697
From:
Registered: Aug 2001

posted 09 April 2002 01:32     Click Here to See the Profile for Sir_General   Click Here to Email Sir_General        Reply w/Quote   Visit Sir_General's Homepage!
That's pure evil.

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Sir_General

That's Sir_General with an _. Leave it out and I'll beat you with a rubber chicken.

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Chineseman
Honorary Warlord

Posts: 357
From: The Philippines
Registered: Mar 2002

posted 09 April 2002 02:24     Click Here to See the Profile for Chineseman   Click Here to Email Chineseman        Reply w/Quote   
Huh? You didn't like it, Sir_General?

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It is difficult to win a friend in a year; it is easy to offend one in an hour.

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Jolly_Reaper
Honorary Warlord

Posts: 384
From: The Netherlands
Registered: Feb 2002

posted 09 April 2002 03:27     Click Here to See the Profile for Jolly_Reaper   Click Here to Email Jolly_Reaper        Reply w/Quote   

Aw man, that is harsh
Poor guy... From 25 inches to zilch.

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The ultimate warrior: The Virtuous Avatar wearing one of FeistyGirl's magical pink Tutu's.
Britannia, beware!!!

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Sir_General
Moderator

Posts: 697
From:
Registered: Aug 2001

posted 09 April 2002 09:51     Click Here to See the Profile for Sir_General   Click Here to Email Sir_General        Reply w/Quote   Visit Sir_General's Homepage!
quote:

Huh? You didn't like it, Sir_General?

No, no. It's not bad, but that doesn't make it any less evil.

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Sir_General

That's Sir_General with an _. Leave it out and I'll beat you with a rubber chicken.

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Beaver
Honorary Warlord

Posts: 1682
From: I live in a dam, down by the river....
Registered: Jan 2002

posted 09 April 2002 10:17     Click Here to See the Profile for Beaver   Click Here to Email Beaver        Reply w/Quote   
Horrible.... truly horrible..... funny.... but horrible.....

25 inches... I would go be a porn star....

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Well, you can tell by the way I use my walk,
I'm a woman's man: no time to talk.
Music loud and women warm, I've been kicked around since I was born.
And now it's all right. It's OK. And you may look the other way.
We can try to understand the New York Times' effect on man.

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Vimes
Lord

Posts: 106
From: The Netherlands
Registered: Apr 2002

posted 09 April 2002 13:13     Click Here to See the Profile for Vimes   Click Here to Email Vimes        Reply w/Quote   Visit Vimes's Homepage!
Auch...

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For the last 20 years I've been trying to get a life... Maybe in the next 20 years I'll try harder...

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Axalon
Honorary Warlord

Posts: 2243
From: New England, USA
Registered: Dec 2001

posted 09 April 2002 22:56     Click Here to See the Profile for Axalon   Click Here to Email Axalon        Reply w/Quote   
I will observe all of this from a safe distance.

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Pink?? Hmmm .. Not so bad a color if you "really" think about it. (Use your imagination);-)

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Chineseman
Honorary Warlord

Posts: 357
From: The Philippines
Registered: Mar 2002

posted 10 April 2002 02:07     Click Here to See the Profile for Chineseman   Click Here to Email Chineseman        Reply w/Quote   
Okay. I also would expect this thread to get locked if it was really evil, but I thought that it was funny.

Before any other form of sh*t happens, here's another one...

A woman is courted by an Arab. She really doesn't like the guy, even though he is rich, and has several companies worldwide. So to brush him off, she says, "If you want to marry me, give me the biggest diamond in the world."

The guy says, "Okay. I buy. I buy."

With this, the woman realized that her tactic didn't go well. So she said, "I also want a mansion in Malibu."

The guy then says, "Okay. I build. I build."

Realizing that material wthings are way too easy for the man, she says, "Well, I want my man to be endowed with 14 inches of manhood!"

The guy then thinks hard, and babbles to himself. After much thought, he replies, "Okay. I cut. I cut."


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It is difficult to win a friend in a year; it is easy to offend one in an hour.

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Carina Flær
Honorary Warlord

Posts: 561
From: Akihabara, Japan
Registered: Feb 2002

posted 10 April 2002 02:49     Click Here to See the Profile for Carina Flær   Click Here to Email Carina Flær        Reply w/Quote   
Man, that's perverted. I like it.

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" In Defeat, Malice; In Victory, Revenge! "

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Jolly_Reaper
Honorary Warlord

Posts: 384
From: The Netherlands
Registered: Feb 2002

posted 10 April 2002 04:44     Click Here to See the Profile for Jolly_Reaper   Click Here to Email Jolly_Reaper        Reply w/Quote   

Eeow! Sick, dude!

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The ultimate warrior: The Virtuous Avatar wearing one of FeistyGirl's magical pink Tutu's.
Britannia, beware!!!

Read some really good fantasy related stories here:
http://dynamic2.gamespy.com/~phrozenkeep/ubb/Forum19/HTML/000458.html
http://dynamic2.gamespy.com/~phrozenkeep/ubb/Forum19/HTML/000424.html

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MPHG
Forum Admin.

Posts: 1693
From: simwhere
Registered: Jun 2001

posted 10 April 2002 10:13     Click Here to See the Profile for MPHG   Click Here to Email MPHG        Reply w/Quote   Visit MPHG's Homepage!
gone to far...sorry

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Come stay a night at my Dragon's Inn

Remember to have your Deeds recorded on the Imperial Scrolls of Honor.

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