Author
|
Topic: Blonde
|
Dr Slue Honorary Warlord
   
Posts: 418 From: Australia Registered: Oct 2001 |
posted 07 November 2001 01:33
Two blondes walk into a bar...you think one of them would've seen it!Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet? So that she didn't wake up the sleeping pills. Why did the blonde leave a coat-hanger in her car? Incase she locked her keys in. What does a blonde keep in case of a blackout? Glow in the dark candles. I'm sorry for the general poorness of these jokes.I just felt the need to say it.

|
Deathscythe Moderator
   
Posts: 1185 From: The Darkest Part of Hell (Shadow Land) Registered: Oct 2001 |
posted 07 November 2001 20:59
hehehe can't keep it?? hehehe but its funny..  ------------------ You're Good But Im better!

|
Dr Slue Honorary Warlord
   
Posts: 418 From: Australia Registered: Oct 2001 |
posted 08 November 2001 02:56
can't keep what?
------------------ «Lèts yÖÐèL!»

|
FeistyGirl Honorary Warlord
   
Posts: 729 From: a padded cell somewhere Registered: Feb 2001 |
posted 11 February 2002 20:49
Why are blonde jokes so short?So men can remember them  ------------------ "I'm a miracle worker. If I work, it's a miracle."

|
Axalon Honorary Warlord
   
Posts: 2243 From: New England, USA Registered: Dec 2001 |
posted 11 February 2002 22:13
LOL! ... hmmm ... blondes are nice, but dark haired women 'do it' for me They have a kind of 'mystery' about them ... and more, just can't put my finger on it ... hmmm ... they're just more 'alluring' to me  ------------------ "To dream a life, or to live a dream ... only through desire shall the sleeper awaken."

|
FeistyGirl Honorary Warlord
   
Posts: 729 From: a padded cell somewhere Registered: Feb 2001 |
posted 12 February 2002 11:54
/me is a "smart" blonde... if such a thing exists...actually my hair color changes from light golden blonde to dark reddish brown fairly often, the dark color does look better to me for some reason but I can't keep it that color as much as I'd like cause all those chemicals wreck my hair  I think I've got a pic of me somewhere I'll see if I can find it and upload it somewhere to post if y'all wanna see? **and NO it's not a nudie pic... It's actually a very old high school pic that I had edited for use in a different forum... ------------------ "I'm a miracle worker. If I work, it's a miracle." [This message has been edited by FeistyGirl (edited 12 February 2002).]

|
jbouley Forum Admin.
    
Posts: 4907 From: Portland, Maine, USA Registered: Jan 2001 |
posted 12 February 2002 15:33
A site frequented mostly by males, a lot of them between the ages of 12 and 18...and you ask a question like that?  Your mere virtual presence probably get testosterone bubbling. Thankfully, I am almost 34 and married...so I can feel harmlessly paternal toward you.  ------------------ - JEFF "A hero is no braver than anyone else. He is only brave five minutes longer." For my latest mod (for LoD/expansion), download Version 1.1 of Sanctuary in Chaos - Or for old stuff (for classic D2), visit my orignal mod site at www.planetdiablo.com/sanctuary

|
Axalon Honorary Warlord
   
Posts: 2243 From: New England, USA Registered: Dec 2001 |
posted 13 February 2002 06:52
quote: Originally posted by FeistyGirl: /actually my hair color changes from light golden blonde to dark reddish brown fairly often, the dark color does look better to me for some reason but I can't keep it that color as much as I'd like cause all those chemicals wreck my hair 
Hmmm ... sounds very nice, like having the best of both worlds You should keep it that way, Feisty, nice and natural ... probably even more mysterious and alluring than an always darked haired woman And I'm *only* 27 and still single, so this is not a paternal point of view  Only 33? Jeff is not THAT harmless! LOL  ------------------ "To dream a life, or to live a dream ... only through desire shall the sleeper awaken."

|
FeistyGirl Honorary Warlord
   
Posts: 729 From: a padded cell somewhere Registered: Feb 2001 |
posted 13 February 2002 08:40
well if you want to see some (really old) pics of me here's a couple:http://www.boomspeed.com/geekgirljess/jesself.gif http://www.boomspeed.com/geekgirljess/jesspic.gif the first one is of course edited, I used it for a while in a different forum as my userimage, it was originally my highschool senior yearbook photo... the second one was taken during my junior year of highschool I'll try to find some more recent pics, my hair is much longer now (about 2 or 3 times as long) ------------------ "I'm a miracle worker. If I work, it's a miracle."

|
MPHG Forum Admin.
    
Posts: 1693 From: simwhere Registered: Jun 2001 |
posted 13 February 2002 09:07
nice pics Now my true power I wouldn't feel right with my self if i looked without giving back. ------------------ Bring Back the Classic. Bring Back the Knowledge. Bringing back to D2 The Classic

|
FeistyGirl Honorary Warlord
   
Posts: 729 From: a padded cell somewhere Registered: Feb 2001 |
posted 13 February 2002 09:50
IT'S JESUS!!  lol j/k Tim... nice pic... I like guys with long hair  ------------------ "I'm a miracle worker. If I work, it's a miracle."

|
Zhoulomcrist Forum Admin.
    
Posts: 3239 From: USA Registered: Jan 2001 |
posted 13 February 2002 12:55
quote: Originally posted by FeistyGirl: IT'S JESUS!! 
Hmmm. It seems that MPHG has done the impossible and proven that there is indeed a higher power above our own . The lord has cometh and the above pic is living proof I will now transfer these posts and merge them into the Religion topic in the Off-Topic forum . Just kidding.....  ------------------ I shall have nothing to do with thy prideful, arrogant, and foolish combat. Leave me and my land apart from thine field of battle and I shall not interfere in any way. But, bring thy stagnant war unto my land and thou wilt be hurled into the abyss. ************************* Classic Diablo II: ZhoulomCrypt Project Administrator

|
MPHG Forum Admin.
    
Posts: 1693 From: simwhere Registered: Jun 2001 |
posted 13 February 2002 15:32
why does everyone think I look like Jesus?really it's becoming a bad habit. ------------------ Bring Back the Classic. Bring Back the Knowledge. Bringing back to D2 The Classic

|
Zhoulomcrist Forum Admin.
    
Posts: 3239 From: USA Registered: Jan 2001 |
posted 13 February 2002 15:34
Long hair tends to have that (JESUS) effect on people, especially if they've got a beard to accompany the hair. Folks used to tell me that same stuff until I got most of mine cut off years ago . ------------------ I shall have nothing to do with thy prideful, arrogant, and foolish combat. Leave me and my land apart from thine field of battle and I shall not interfere in any way. But, bring thy stagnant war unto my land and thou wilt be hurled into the abyss. ************************* Classic Diablo II: ZhoulomCrypt Project Administrator [This message has been edited by Zhoulomcrist (edited 13 February 2002).]

|
Axalon Honorary Warlord
   
Posts: 2243 From: New England, USA Registered: Dec 2001 |
posted 13 February 2002 15:39
Jesus!! You are Jesus!! Cooool!! MPHG is the Son of God!! (I've always suspected a divine presence within you ) ... Now first I want to know ... the real deal between you and Mary Magdalene hehehe ...Oh, and Feisty ... your an Elf!! Wow!! Today is a good day!  ------------------ "To dream a life, or to live a dream ... only through desire shall the sleeper awaken."

|
jbouley Forum Admin.
    
Posts: 4907 From: Portland, Maine, USA Registered: Jan 2001 |
posted 13 February 2002 15:56
With my reddish-brown hair, beard, and generally mild demeanor (except when I overturn moneychangers' tables at the temple )...I got Jesus comments all the time when I had long hair a few years back.A receding hairline and slowly growing bald spot on top made me switch to a shorter, more Sting-like hair style...so I don't get that anymore. Thank God for that...I was starting to feel self-conscious. Last thing I'm willing to do is getting nailed to a cross for anyone else's sins.  ------------------ - JEFF "A hero is no braver than anyone else. He is only brave five minutes longer." For my latest mod (for LoD/expansion), download Version 1.1 of Sanctuary in Chaos - Or for old stuff (for classic D2), visit my orignal mod site at www.planetdiablo.com/sanctuary

|
MPHG Forum Admin.
    
Posts: 1693 From: simwhere Registered: Jun 2001 |
posted 13 February 2002 16:03
getting nailed to a cross isn't that bad, c'mon many worse fates are out there.here's a few I wouldn't be happy with thrown into a 8 foot pit of leeched with those spikes pointed downard on the walls of he pit. 1000 paper cuts on every part of the body and thrown into a vat of salt water. being in the dark chamber thats 2ft square 8 feet tall while a sound track of snakes is playing and air tubes are htting your feet. these are a few of my favorite cruel ideas lol. 
nah really me and a friend had a contest for worse fate these were my top 3  ------------------ Bring Back the Classic. Bring Back the Knowledge. Bringing back to D2 The Classic

|
Axalon Honorary Warlord
   
Posts: 2243 From: New England, USA Registered: Dec 2001 |
posted 13 February 2002 16:16
Quote from Jbouley:"With my reddish-brown hair, beard, and generally mild demeanor (except when I overturn moneychangers' tables at the temple ) Now, Jeff ... you must control temper, flipping over tables like that, I'm shocked I get the Jesus thing too whenever I visit mother and have a bit of beard, I already the long locks (it's the rock n' roll thing, I just can't let go!!! ) ------------------ "To dream a life, or to live a dream ... only through desire shall the sleeper awaken."

|
Zhoulomcrist Forum Admin.
    
Posts: 3239 From: USA Registered: Jan 2001 |
posted 13 February 2002 17:11
quote: Originally posted by MPHG: getting nailed to a cross isn't that bad, c'mon many worse fates are out there.here's a few I wouldn't be happy with
I know one thing, I'd sure as hell hate it when folks started stonin' the horse mess outta me with rock-hard projectiles. I'm in no business to do no dyin' for no sins. Lord knows that I've done alot of sinnin' in the past of my own and I can only imagine where things'd go with this earth if a sinner such as myself had died for everyone else's. *Zhoulomcrist envisions his own death and projects the vision into a round shiny black orb on a pedestal being held in place by bone claws. After death by stoning on the cross, a vision of the 3 prime evils and the lesser evils, Azmodan, Belial, Duriel, and Andariel come into view. The world appears dead, rivers turned to blood, and skies darkened..... But, indeed, it is agreed that there can be worse fates. ..... *This was very true and to magnify that truth, Zhoulomcrist happened upon an age old algebra qui............ ERROR: WRONG SCRIPT!!!! Zhoulomcrist chunks the faulty movie script on the floor followed by alot of stompin'!!  ------------------ I shall have nothing to do with thy prideful, arrogant, and foolish combat. Leave me and my land apart from thine field of battle and I shall not interfere in any way. But, bring thy stagnant war unto my land and thou wilt be hurled into the abyss. ************************* Classic Diablo II: ZhoulomCrypt Project Administrator [This message has been edited by Zhoulomcrist (edited 13 February 2002).]

|
Axalon Honorary Warlord
   
Posts: 2243 From: New England, USA Registered: Dec 2001 |
posted 13 February 2002 18:14
Funny how things can progress ... from a dumb blonde joke ... to the most horrible fate imaginable ... an eternity of listening to a constant lightspeed stream of dumb blonde jokes kind of ties it all together, quite nicely ------------------ "To dream a life, or to live a dream ... only through desire shall the sleeper awaken."

|
Zhoulomcrist Forum Admin.
    
Posts: 3239 From: USA Registered: Jan 2001 |
posted 13 February 2002 18:18
This happens constantly here at the keep and has numerous times in the past . It is a fairly common deal here at the keep for a topic to shift a number of times before it finishes .------------------ I shall have nothing to do with thy prideful, arrogant, and foolish combat. Leave me and my land apart from thine field of battle and I shall not interfere in any way. But, bring thy stagnant war unto my land and thou wilt be hurled into the abyss. ************************* Classic Diablo II: ZhoulomCrypt Project Administrator

|
Jolly_Reaper Honorary Warlord
   
Posts: 384 From: The Netherlands Registered: Feb 2002 |
posted 14 February 2002 09:05
Ehm, isn't it safer to lock some of you guys away? The ideas some people have to torture someone... It...scares me...------------------ Computers are like airconditioners, they both stop working properly when you open windows...

|
WaxMonkey Squire

Posts: 46 From: Portland, OR Registered: Jan 2002 |
posted 14 February 2002 15:00
Well to end it on the only blond joke I know, here goes.How do you keep a blonde busy for hours? Give her a bag of M&M's and tell her to alphabetize them. Or the alternate punch line is... Tell her to separate the W's from the M's... Now is when I duck and cover...

|
snarfoogle Serf
Posts: 1 From: Registered: Feb 2002 |
posted 16 February 2002 18:54
Oooh! I've got a blond joke!True, blondes have more fun, but they also have more STDs!

|
DigiBO Moderator
   
Posts: 1413 From: Bulgaria,Varna Registered: Jan 2001 |
posted 18 February 2002 13:46
There is another way to keep a blonde busy...Just give here a small sheet of paper with "Look on the other side" written on both sides  ------------------ You can't learn to be kewl or leet.It comes from inside and it's in everyone.You just have to reach it,but not by looking at the others - look at yourself.Be kewl.Be leet.Be yourself.

|